Having it All, Yet Nothing at the Same Time
by fashionpixi
Summary: Isabella Swan has everything. Hundreds of friends, money, fame, but is it enough? What happens when her fiancee Jacob Black deceives her, and she flees to a small town? She meets Edward Cullen but the timing is all wrong.
1. Chapter 1

Hi! If you are reading this welcome to my very first fic!

Thanks for choosing this story, and I hope you enjoy it.

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Twilight; the lovely Stephenie Meyer does so thank her for inspiring this story. **

Without a further ado I present to you:

Having it All, Yet Nothing at the Same Time

To anyone on the outside looking in, my life might seem perfect. My parents are co-owners of the hottest chain of restaurants and night clubs in Los Angeles. I have dated many eligible bachelors and I am currently engaged to be married to the hottest NFL star Jacob Black.

We've been dating no longer than eight months, but when he proposed last New Year's, in front of both our families, there was no way I could say no. Besides this is something both my parents have been dreaming of since I was a child.

I was born Isabella Marie Swan on September 13th 1989. My parents are Charles and Renee Swan. They met when they were just two teenagers living in a small town in Northern California. They both shared the same dream, to live in the city someday, and make something out of their lives. Somehow they thought their love, and aspirations would get them far. Unfortunately reality set in when they arrived, with little money, and no place to live. But my father had his goals set, and would stop at nothing to reach them. He and my mother quickly found jobs, my mother at a local restaurant, and my father at a Four Seasons Hotel. My father worked up to 18 hours a day, and whatever money didn't go into paying for rent, or food was saved. Almost a year after arriving in Los Angeles my mother became pregnant with my oldest brother Stefan. My father worked harder than ever knowing it was his responsibility to take care of his family. Two months after Stefan's birth, and exactly a year after, his first day at the hotel, my father was promoted to assistant manager of the hotel. It didn't take long for him to work his way up to full time manager.

My father always calls it hard work, but I believe there was some luck involved, seeing how there were people way more qualified and deserving of my father's job. When Stefan was almost a year old my mother became pregnant again, this time with my brother Liam. That was right around the time, my father, started insisting that my mother attend all kinds of exclusive parties, which he got invited to through work. He always believed he was destined for more, then just a life as a hotel manager.

Which is why he was delighted when, three years later, he got the news that my mother was pregnant with me. My mother was a beautiful woman and my father knew that there would be no door that wasn't open to that degree of beauty. And I didn't disappoint. I was born faired skinned, with reddish brown waves like my mother's, and big brown eyes which were exact replicas of my father's eyes.

My parents always made sure I attended the best private schools, because it was important to socialize with all the local socialites, and build a name for myself. I had private instructors, tutors, and attended the most prestigious private school. It didn't take my parents long to climb the social latter.

By the time I turned four my parents owned a home in the Hollywood hills, and my father was in charge of all the business transactions at the hotel. He was also in charge of promoting the hotel internationally, which meant my family had the luxury of traveling, and taking extended vacations. That is until the year I became a freshman in high school. My father made a bad investment, with a business partner he had in New York. We ended up losing all our savings and were forced to sell our home and move into a small apartment.

My parents did all they could to keep me in private school, and buy me all the latest clothes, but nothing would've been possible without my best friend Rosalie Hale. Her parents alone are the reason I sit here today. When my parents could no longer afford to pay for my education, Eleazar and Carmen Hale stepped in and offered to pay for my schooling.

Of course those hard times are all forgotten now, and a topic not allowed in my home. Most of my friends don't know it even happened. But no matter whether or not it's forgotten, Rose and I will always have a special bond. She's like a sister to me, and often times my protector. She is the only person with a serious problem with my engagement. She doesn't think Jake is good enough for me, even if he is a superstar quarterback for the New York Giants. I think her biggest issue is that once married, I will be forced to move to New York, a fact that I've tried to suppress since Jake proposed. But he is a good man and there is no good reason why I shouldn't marry him. He sure makes my parents happy.

My phone starts to ring pulling me out of my reminiscing.

The caller ID indicates Jake is calling. I start for the door as I pick up the call. "Hey babe I'm coming outside to get you." I walk outside but I don't see the usual black SUV.

"Hello, Bella?" Jacob says, and now I can hear all the noise in the background. "Baby my meeting ran late, I'm just leaving James's office right now." James is Jacob's agent, who I can't stand but have learned to live with. Just his voice in the background is putting me on edge.

"It's okay I'll just tell everyone you're running late, but will be here in a little" I try not to sound mad that James, once again, is the reason he is late.

"Well actually Bells, would you mind if I skip the party? I've been in and out of meeting the whole day and just want to go home." Now I'm really mad! It's his fault I'm even here. When the invitation came for Jessica Stanley's party, he was the one that insisted we go, and now he was standing me up!

"So you're not coming?" I snap at him.

"Listen Bells don't get mad. I promise I'll go with you to the next one." He says like I was the one who wanted to go.

"Fine. Don't worry about it" I decide to hang up the phone before the conversation turns into a full blown argument.

I stand outside for the next five minutes pacing the sidewalk, trying to justify what Jake just did. How am I supposed to go home and act like nothing's wrong? It's not like it's the first time he does this. I decide to get over it and call the only person who always saves me in these occasions. I know I shouldn't call her, because if there is anyone who can't stand Jessica more than me it is Rosalie Hale.

The phone rings three times before she answers. "Hello."

"Hey Rosie." I try to say in the sweetest voice I can manage.

"Bella please tell me you didn't let Jacob talk you into going to Jessica's party?"

"Um well, maybe." A long sigh escapes my mouth.

"What's wrong?" Rosalie's voice changes from her lecturing voice into concern.

"Well Jake was supposed to meet me here after he got out of his meeting with James, and those new endorsement guys, but now he's claiming he is too tired to make it." I see no point in lying to her. "I don't know what to do. It's not like I can just leave, I just got here." Not to mention my mother would not be too happy if her daughter acted like a "rude brat", as she calls it. She and Mrs. Stanley are good friends.

Without hesitation Rose says "I'm on my way. It's at the Boulevard3 right?"

"Thanks Rosie, I really didn't want to have to be here alone"

"No problem, I'll be there in 20 minutes".

Rosalie arrives in less than 20 minutes. As always she looks breathtaking, in a short fitted sequence dress, paired with a pair of patent leather pumps. Her long blonde hair is pulled back into a chic bun, and she is wearing her signature red lipstick.

She pulls my arm and says "Okay let's get this over with."

Lady Gaga's Bad Romance blasts from the speakers as Rosalie and I walk in. I know by her pace, that Rosalie isn't planning on staying for long. We quickly make our way to the private booth that is set up for the party. In the center seats Jessica, looking like she's had her fair share of drinks. Next to her seats Mike Newton, her on and off boyfriend, who also happens to be my ex. His parents and mine are business partners, so I guess you can say we grew up together. I like to think that he and I still have a good friendship. What he is doing with Jessica is a mystery to me. Poor guy gets treated worse than a dog.

"Where did you go Bella?" Lauren on Jessica's left asks. Lauren is Jessica's best friend.

"Yeah, and where is Jacob?" Tyler, Lauren's boyfriend asks.

I am about to give them Jacob's excuse when Rose speaks up. "Jacob has been held up by meetings the whole day; he really wanted to come but has to take an early flight tomorrow morning. So I decided to come with Bella. How could I miss the chance to wish Jessica a happy birthday?" Rose says in her most sarcastic tone. Jessica just smiles up at her, looking like she doesn't know what's going on. Rosalie and I decide Jessica is far too drunk to remember anything.

We decided to hit the dance floor, and make the most of the night. But by the fifth song Rose and I have had enough. We make our way to the table again, this time Jessica is laid out on the booth passed out. We say out goodbyes to everyone and make a quick exit.

**Reviews would be awesome. Please let me know what you think!**


	2. Chapter 2

_Welcome back! Thanks to all of you who have added this story to your favorites. It truly means a lot to me. Please feel free to leave some feedback; it will definitely help with the writing of future chapters. _

_**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Twilight; I do however plan on meeting Mrs. Meyer for the third time at the Breaking Dawn premiere on Nov. 14!**_

Finally Rosalie and I are outside and the last thing I want to do is go home. Rose runs off to get us a cab and I am left alone with my thoughts. It is bad enough I was forced into this situation, but know I have to go home and deal with Jacob. In reality, I was already over the whole thing; after all it wasn't the first time he'd stood me up. What really got to me was his complete disregard for all and any plans we made, even when the plans involved the wedding. Just last week, we were supposed to meet with the wedding planner and of course he showed up more than forty minutes late. I'm starting to suspect that James isn't the only reason he has been putting off or showing up late to the appointments with the wedding planner.

Sometime I feel like I can't talk to anyone. Sure I have Rosalie but her opinion of Jacob clouds her judgment on the matter. And then there is my mother who pretty much worships the ground he walks on. My father is a bit more understanding, but he too cannot wait for the wedding. As for my two older brothers, they pretty much adopted Jacob into our family immediately after we started dating. Sometimes it seems all they care about is the attention the Black last name would bring. Somehow my parents have deluded themselves into thinking I like the attention I get for being engaged to one of the most sought out NFL star. In reality I couldn't care less. To me Jake is just a regular guy, who I met in a bar almost a year ago. I didn't even know who he was until the morning after our first date. I remember having my face plastered on countless blogs and even some magazines. Luckily the interest to know who Jacob Black's fiancée is has finally died down. I seriously have a problem with my personal life being displayed for everyone to see.

At last Rosalie finds us a cab, and we both settle in for the 20 minute drive to my place. We sit in complete silence, as I watch the city pass by from the window. Hmmm how I will miss getting lost in the streets of Los Angeles. Walking down Hollywood Blvd, taking trips to the downtown fashion district, or even walking down the boardwalk at Venice beach. These are places Rose and I escape to when our lives become too much to bare. What will happen when I no longer have the streets of the city I know and love to run to, or worse not having Ros…I stop that thought in its track. But it is too late though, I can feel the tears start to prick my eyes. I wipe them off before they can run down my face, the last thing I need to do right now is get sentimental about my move to New York.

I turn my head to face forward when I catch a glimpse of Rosalie looking at me. One look and I know she can already sense my fear. The fear that I am making a huge mistake by marrying Jacob Black. I open my mouth to say something but she beats me to it.

"I am so sorry Bella." It catches me by surprise, why is she apologizing to me?

"For what Rosalie?" I cannot come up with any reason why she would be apologizing. After all she basically dropped all her plans tonight to come and be with me.

She stares at me with tears in her eyes "for being such a terrible friend. This whole time all I've been able to see is how much you struggle with the decision to marry Jacob, yet all I've done is act like a selfish bitch instead of supporting you." I can't do anything but stare at the tears running down her eyes, and all I want to do is console her, but I know how important it is to let her finish.

"It's just that you are like a sister to me and I really don't want you to get hurt. You deserve a man who will treat you like the amazing woman that you are, someone who will love you unconditionally. If you think Jacob is that man then I really don't have any reason to question your judgment". I stare in awe, mesmerized by what she just said. I can see how difficult it must've been for her to put her prejudice aside.

A huge sigh of relief escapes my mouth, for the first time since Jacob put that diamond ring on my finger, I feel like I might actually be doing the right thing. I search for the appropriate words but my mind comes up empty. All I can manage before I pull Rosalie into a tight hug is "Thank you."

We pull up in front of my condo; I take a couple of deep breaths and step out. I wave at Rosalie as the cab drives away. I fumble around my purse looking for my keys and make my way to the front door of the building. Garrett who guards the lobby most nights greats me, and presses the button to summon for the elevator. I make my way in and head for the 5th floor. I step out and find the front door to my condo. As soon as I walk in I head for the kitchen and boil some water for tea. I decided to grab a change of clothes while I wait for my tea to cool a bit.

In the dark I can make out Jacob's body sprawled out on the bed in nothing more than a pair of boxers. He turns so that his face is illuminated by the light streaming from the window, and all I see is the guy I fell in love with. Yeah, he can be insensitive and inconsiderate sometimes, but he is also the man that took me away to Santa Barbara on our third date. We spent the whole weekend locked away in his vacation home, drinking wine, and cuddling next to the fire place. I almost felt like I was back in high school, celebrating an anniversary for every month of our relationship. Now if he could only remember to show up to our meetings with the wedding planner on time….

I pull on a black silk nightgown, and head outside to drink my tea. I walk around the condo as I sip on my tea, and try to imagine my life with Jacob. He's career forcing him to be away from home, and leaving me alone for months on end. Was I prepared to put up with such a hectic schedule? What about when we decided to have kids, would he be able to work around his schedule to spend more time at home? Would he decide to retire early, or would we travel with him? That's often the case for most woman married to professional athletes. All I know is that if he is willing to put in the effort to make it work, so would I.

Once in bed Jacob wraps his arms around my waist, and pulls me into his body. I can't tell if he is awake or still sleeping, but then he whispers a soft "I'm sorry" in my ear. That's all it takes for me to relax and let myself enjoy the heat radiating from his chest.

The next morning I wake up at 7:30 am so that I can be at work by 9. My job is to run the office my father keeps downtown. I'm in charge of the P.R for all the restaurants, and the clubs my parents co-own. It's a rare occasion when I actually have to come into the office; I can usually get away with working from home. Today my parents are coming over to discuss the details for the renovations of the club they are buying out. My mother is also dying to know how the plans for the wedding are coming along. Typically girls would prefer to ask their mother's for help planning their weddings, not me. I figured she'd likely go overboard, and I'd end up with a wedding where I'd only know a hand full of the guest. She'd probably invite every magazine and newspaper in the L.A area.

I don't hear Jacob outside so I assume he had an early meeting. A lot of endorsement deals have been coming his way, so he spends his days in meetings, and flying back and forth from New York. Once in a while I make those trips with him; after all we need to find a place to live before the wedding.

When I walk out of the room Jacob is seated on one of the breakfast bar stools. Next to him is a bed tray with some yogurt topped with granola, a bowl of fresh fruit and a mug of coffee, my usual breakfast. He catches sight of me, as I walk across the living room to get to the kitchen.

"Oh hey, I was hoping to get done before you got up. I didn't think you'd be up for another hour." Jake says as he walks over to me.

"Believe me if I had a choice I'd still be sleeping. My parents need me to be at the office by nine. They're coming in to explain the renovation for the club they are buying on Sunset."

He wraps his arms around me and says "I've missed you. I feel like we've barely had time to be together". He leans in for a soft kiss. I follow his lead and wrap my arms around his neck, and deepen the kiss.

Sadly I remember the reason why I'm up so early, and pull away. "Baby, as much as I would like to stay with you the whole day, I can't. I should probably get going; you know how my dad feels about punctuality.

I quickly eat the breakfast that Jacob prepared for me and head out. I pull up at Swan Enterprise and as always Angela the full time manager of the office greets me with a genuine smile. She is one of the few people that work for my parents that I actually like. Most of the girls in the office only stay because working for Swan Enterprise guarantees an entrance to all the top parties in town. They're all snobby stuck up bitches that don't know the first thing about my parent's business. I often question what my father was thinking when he hired them. Turns out they are good for business, a lot of their families invest money in the company, and they spread the word about the clubs and restaurants. I guess it's a win win situation when I'm not the one having to put up with them. Angela is different though. She's the only one I've actually bothered to build a friendship with. She attends business school at USC, so working here is building experience for the future. She might even get to take over my position when I move to New York.

"Hey Ang." I say as I hand her the cup of chai tea I picked up for her on my way over. "How's it going? Has my dad called?"

"Thanks Bella, you remembered." She says as she takes the first sip. "Everything is great, just trying to get through school. I'm lucky your father is so flexible with my schedule, and he did call earlier today to tell me you were coming in. How are things with you? Have you and Jake decide on the location for the wedding?"

"I've been alright, going a little crazy with all the planning but nothing too bad. I'm just glad I've finally convinced my mother I don't need two hundred people at the wedding. We haven't made the final decision on the location, but Jake and I really liked a property in Santa Barbara. It's right by his vacation house." My thoughts immediately go to the beautiful beach front property Jake and I fell in love with when scouting for locations.

"That's great!" Angela says as she continues to sip her tea. "Ben and I are talking about maybe moving in together. It would just be more practical for both of us, since I already spend most nights at his apartment."

"So you and Ben are getting pretty serious?" I am genuinely happy for her. In the two years that she has been working for Swan Enterprise Angela has had her fair share of relationship problems. "Will you be getting a place together, or are you planning on moving into his place since its closer to campus?"

"We haven't thought it through that far. We just want to make sure the relationship can handle us moving in together. I mean, I don't know the first thing about living with a boyfriend."

I lean in closer to her and put my hand on her arm "Hey there is nothing to worry about." I give her a reassuring smile and continued "just make sure that's what you really want, don't feel pressured to say yes just because it's more convenient." How ironic that I would be the one giving Angela relationship advice. Since I should probably be the one getting it. "Anyway I should probably go in and get ready for my parents".

My parents arrived a bit later with blueprints and estimates for the renovation. All I have to do is contact the contractors and send out the checks. I also have to make sure the building is up to code, and renew the liquor license. I can do all those things from home in less than a week. If only it was that easy to get my mother off my case about the wedding. She is also curious about how the house search is going. I guess it's understandable, I am her little girl, and she wants to make sure I have a good life. I almost feel guilty for not letting her get more involved in the wedding. To make up for that, I decide to invite her to my next dress fitting. I'm torn between two gowns. One is a beautiful rose colored Oscar de la Renta, and the other a beautiful sweetheart neckline with feather embellishments by Monique Lhuillier.

After my parents leave I decide to take Angela out for lunch at a local Bistro. After running a couple of errands, I stop at the grocery store and pick up the ingredients for Jacob's favorite meal. After getting all the things I need to make chicken parmesan, I head home to get started on dinner.

After about an hour of getting started Jacob comes home and, it's as if I live with a five year old. He tries to convince me that it is important for him to check if the marinara sauce has all the right ingredients. He also volunteers to help me make some chocolate chip cookies, but just ends up eating all the chocolate. After about his eighth attempt to deep bread into the marinara sauce, I kick him out of the kitchen. After a bit of a tantrum he goes off to shower before dinner.

After setting the table and opening a bottle of wine, we settle down to eat. Jacob starts telling me about his meetings. I tell him about the meeting with my parents, and remind him that we have a meeting with the wedding planner to decide on the location for the wedding. After dinner I finally let him have some of the chocolate chip cookies, which he claims came out delicious because he helped make them. I let him think whatever he likes, and ignore the fact that he doesn't know the first thing about baking.

After dinner he helps me clear out the table and load the dishwasher. Once we're done wiping the counters down, he comes up behind me and wraps his arms around my waist. He starts kissing my neck and when he gets to my ear he whispers "I love you" into it. I turn around to face him and lean into him so that I can enjoy the heat in his chest. It's been a while since we were like this. I look up to meet his eyes and finally allow myself to truly forgive him for standing me up last night, and for not being more involve with the wedding.

This time I am the one who initiates the kissing. It starts of slow and tender but it quickly turns into heavy desperate kissing. I wrap my arms around his neck as he pushes me into the counter. He cups my ass and picks me up to press his hard-on into me. I hop on to the counter and wrap my legs around his waist. He kisses down my neck, and slowly lifts my shirt. I feel a shiver run down my back as he caresses it. He makes his way back to my ass lifts me, and starts towards our bedroom.

Once he sets me down I yank his shirt off and press our bodies together. I slowly lay down on the bed and he follows my lead. Our kisses continue to grow more heated, when all of a sudden his phone begins to ring. At first we ignore it, but after the fifth call he stands and yanks his phone from the nightstand. He looks at it and sighs "it's James. It must be important, I should probably get it". With that said he storms out of the room to answer the phone. Under any other circumstances I would have been pissed, but Jacob seemed genuinely worried about the call.

After about twenty minutes on the phone, Jacob comes back into the room looking extremely anxious. One look and I know there is something very wrong. He just looks at me and says "we need to talk".

**Oh oh nothing good ever follows those four words. Well I hope you enjoyed this chapter. If you liked it please let me know, and if you didn't I'd still like to hear from you. Until next time ;) **


	3. Chapter 3

_Hey guys thanks for coming back! I have yet to receive any reviews but I'm glad you have added this story to your favorites, and/or signed up for alerts. It really does mean a lot. I know this is more than extremely LATE and I am so very sorry about that! What can I say…I got caught up with life after camp Breaking Dawn. With that said I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving weekend! _

_**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Twilight the lovely Stephenie Meyer does, I did however get to have an AMAZING conversation with her on Saturday the 12**__**th**__**. Got a signed book, hug, and picture =).**_

A million scenarios ran through my mind as Jacob led me to the dining room table. He poured me and himself a glass of wine, I guess he felt his news would require some liquid courage. We sat still for what felt like hours, but really only were a couple of minutes, when he finally looked up at me.

He took a deep breath and began. "Look Bella don't freak out, it's not that big of a deal." I could tell he was trying to choose his words carefully as to not upset me, but the more he beat around the bush, the more anxious I got. "James was just calling to let me know that coach Clapp has rearranged our training schedule."

Was that supposed to explain the expression on his face, or was I missing something? Confused out of my mind I ask "what does that mean?"

Another couple of deep breaths escape his mouth before he starts again. "It means that I have to leave for training in a week." I'm at a loss for words. Originally we were supposed to have another two months before he was set to go off to training camp. That would have given us until April to get the wedding in order and find a place in New York.

"So what happens now? Do I stay here, plan the wedding, and wait for you to finish training?" He is still looking at me like I'm not grasping the big picture.

"Bella the reason why we need to head into training early is because coach wants us to start playing right away." I still don't know what his trying to tell me. "Let me make this simple for you. We go to camp next week, and have our first game in three weeks. We hit the road in no more than a month."

Now I understand perfectly. If his team makes it through the pre-season that means he'll pretty much be on the road until next year. I'm scared to ask but I force myself to. "So where does that leave us?"

Dead silence.

I repeat myself "Jacob where does that leave us?"

Finally he answers "I don't know Bella." He looks at me with cautious eyes and continues "I guess it's up to you to decide, I can't force you to follow me to New York right now. I know you were counting on having time to find a place, but I've asked James to find us one. He said it'll take some time to find something permanent, but that he'd let us know when he did. As for the wedding, I think it'd be best if we wait until the season is over".

So those were our only options? To let a man I disliked choose our home, and to wait possibly up to a year for the wedding. To say that I wasn't satisfied with the choices was a huge understatement. I was sure James wasn't too thrilled about having to find us a place either. He'd likely not take any of my requests into consideration. So the only thing I could think of doing is to let Jacob go off to camp while I prepare for the move. First I'd have to break it to my parents that the wedding was being postponed until possibly next year, and then I'd have to start looking for a place in New York.

This whole time Jacob just sat and watched me think everything through in my head. Finally after considering the pros and cons of the plan I spoke up. "Okay so the wedding is postponed, fine, but there is no way in hell I am letting James pick our future home. You can go off to camp next week and while you're there I can travel back in forth looking for a place. That way by the time you're on the road you'll have a place to come home to."

After thinking through the plan himself he asks "are you sure? I know how difficult the move will be for you". He was right the move would be difficult. I would be leaving all my family and friends behind. I would get lonely when Jacob was away, but in reality maybe this was for the best. I realized that the longer I stayed here and contemplated the move, the harder it would be. So it was set I will be living in New York in less than two months.

The first thing I do when I wake up in the morning is call Rosalie, but her phone sends me straight to voicemail. She's probably on a job. Rosalie works as a stylist for a small magazine centered in Los Angeles. As I hear the beep I start "Rose is there any way we can hang out tonight? I really need to have some girl time, I'll tell Angela too. Give me a ring when you get this".

After leaving a message for Angela as well, I decided to get started on my tasks for the day. I spend the whole morning on the phone making sure all the renovations at the club are going well. Finally by noon Rosalie calls me back and we make plans to meet at a little café by Venice beach. Angela also agrees to meet us there at eight. I contemplate calling my mother and father next but decide against it. I think it'd be best if I give them the news in person.

Jacob is gone the whole day again. James had to bump up all his meetings for the next several weeks, so he's off to spend the whole day meeting with different companies to discuss endorsement deals. He feels bad that he has to leave me home alone when we only have the week to spend time together, but I assure him it's not his fault and that I understand.

He comes home while I'm getting ready to meet Rosalie and Angela. "Hey. How was your day?" He says as he wraps his arms around me.

"Productive, I spent the day working. I had to call the contractors and make sure everything is up to date. I have to meet with them at the club tomorrow to inspect their work. What about you? You must be exhausted." I really don't want him to feel bad for what happened, so I'm trying to act nonchalant.

"Yeah it was a long day, but at least I'm home now. What are you getting ready for?" He releases me but doesn't look upset that I'm going out for the night.

"Oh I'm just meeting Rosalie and Angela for some drinks. I already ordered you some take-out it should be here soon. Are you going to be okay here without me?'

"Yeah, of course don't worry about me. Go and have fun with Rose and Ang."

I give him a kiss goodbye and head for the door. I suddenly feel terrible for leaving him home alone, and contemplate asking him to join us, but figure he'd have a better time if he stays home and relaxes. On that thought I make me way to the car garage, I decided against a cab since the café is a bit of a drive away.

I'm at the Beachside Café in less than thirty minutes, where Rosalie is already seated and waiting on us. The hostess greats me and leads me to our table. I love this place. The atmosphere is refreshing with none of the stuffy stuck up clients my parent's restaurants receive. They also have an excellent menu where all the food is organic and locally grown.

Rosalie is at our usual table with a bottle of wine waiting to be served. She must've known I was in dire need if I was willing to make the half hour drive here. She greets me with a loud "Hey Bells!" I can tell she is trying to hide her concern but I can see it in her eyes as she gets up to give me a hug. "I feel like we haven't had a time to hang out in so long. How are things with you and Jake?" This is the first time I have ever heard Rosalie refer to Jacob by his nickname. That alone bring a lump to my throat, I can see the effort she is making.

"Yeah I feel like it's been too long. I know I just saw you the other night, but I've really missed you. As for how things are with Jake, that is sort of what this whole meeting is about, but I'll wait for Angela to get here to start". Right as I finished the sentence Angela steps into the dining room in her usual attire. Light skinny jeans, an over-sized white button-up, a pair of nude wedges, and an oversized tote bag. She wears her light brown hair down in loose waves that frame her heart shaped face.

The first words that leave her mouth are "sorry I'm late, Charlie needed me to finish filing some documents before I left". I go into a bit of a panic mode when she mentions my father. I still haven't told him or my mother about the change of plans.

Rosalie is the first to speak up. "Don't worry about it Ang, Bella just got here a few minutes ago".

"Yeah, no need to apologize; I know how my father can be. Did you tell him you were meeting with Rosalie and I? He called me this morning but I never got around to returning the call". More like I was too afraid to answer the call, since I am such a bad liar, and terrible at hiding things, I knew he would see that something was off right away. Let alone what my mother would do if I chose to give them the news by phone.

"No, I just told him I was meeting some friends for dinner". Now I can see that Angela, like Rosalie, can see that there is something wrong. "So?" A sigh escapes her lips before she continues. "How are things? You sounded a little tense on the phone this morning, is everything okay?"

"Yeah everything is fine. It's just that last night Jake got a call from his agent, turns out his couch wants the team to head to camp early. He wants them to start playing right away". After we order our food, I give Rosalie and Angela a rundown of everything that happened the night before. How Jake reacted to the news, and how the wedding had to be postponed, but that the move to New York would still happen, just sooner than expected.

Rosalie and Angela stay quit and listen intently to the whole retelling of last night's events. Finally Rosalie speaks up "I hope the media doesn't find out about the postponing of the wedding, they'll have a field day with a story like that". I hadn't thought of it but she is right. It wouldn't be the first time they got their hands on information and blown it out of proportion. I remember countless stories being written about me when I first started dating Jacob. Most recent that we had eloped and were expecting a baby, just because we had been sighted in Las Vegas, and I had refused a drink from one of the guys at the bar. I remember how pissed I had been about the whole ordeal but James had claimed that bad publicity was better than none. Ha more like false publicity! Now I just hoped the word didn't get out until things were settled, or at least until I had a chance to explain to my parents what was going on.

"Oh my gosh that would be horrible!" Angela joins the conversation.

"It really would be, so let's hope that is not the case." Not to mention how my parents would react if they found out about my postponed wedding through a gossip magazine. It's so ridiculous how much people pay attention to tabloids. I personally despise them, and try my hardest not to read them, but when I do I take it all in with a grain of salt because I know half of those stories aren't true. There is something about having a camera shoved in your face while trying to leave an event that I will never get used to. I remember when people thought I liked the attentions, and liked having my face plastered on magazines and blogs. James even when as far as approaching Jacob and I, shortly after our engagement was announced, to see if we were interested in having our own reality show. That idea was pretty much dead as soon as the words left his mouth. I was glad I was there to put a stop to that plan, because Jacob was ready to take James's deal.

After dinner and a few drinks we decided to take a walk down the boardwalk before calling it a night. Angela tells me she has some family friends in New York that can refer me to a great realtor. Rosalie also agrees to make some of the trips to New York with me, she claims there is no way I can choose a place without her approval, and I'm immediately thankful for having such great friends.

When I get home Jacob is still awake. A soon as I walk into the condo I can hear the sound of ESPN's Sport Center coming from the living room. How the man can dedicate his living to sports and still have the energy to watch them on TV is a mystery to me, but hey to each their own. I am feeling much better, and have a brighter outlook about the situation after meeting with my girls. I think Jacob notices too because as soon as I step foot in the living room he shuts off the TV and makes his way to me.

"Had a nice night out with the girls?" He asks as he lays the first kiss on my cheek. "I missed you. Are you feeling better about what we talked about last night?"

"Yeah. It was nice to have someone to talk to. How about you? Are you okay with everything that is going on?"

"Ha are you kidding? I'm just glad you're putting up with all this shit." As he says that he pulls off the hair tie holding my hair up. Once my hair is down he sweeps it to the side and begins kissing his way down to my neck. A small laugh escapes me, so he stops to ask "what's wrong?"

"Nothing, just hoping we don't get interrupted this time." With that said I push him back down into the couch and straddle him.

"Ahem so where were we last night?" Is all he manages to get out before I pull his mouth to mine.

Jacob manages to pick me up and carry me to our bed room. Once he sets me down I grab the hem of his t-shirt and his shirt is off in a matter of seconds. I have a chance to admire his abs for a few seconds before he rids me of my blouse. He lays me down on the bed where he proceeds to slowly slip my jeans off. Once they're off I pull him forward so that his full body is pressing against mine. That seems to drive him crazy and the evidence is rubbing up against me. I wrap my legs around his waist in an attempt to get closer. A few more seconds and we are both lying on the bed fully naked. I spread my legs even farther and sigh once he enters me.

**Hope you enjoyed this chapter! Once again I apologize for making you guys wait so long. Also for those who might be starting to wonder is this is still a Bella & Edward story it most certainly is, PROMISE. Believe me there is a reason why the Bella & Jacob scenes aren't too graphic. **

**With that said hope this chapter inspires you to leave a comment. Let me know what you think =) **


	4. Chapter 4

**I know it has been a while...I thought I'd finish the chapter and see what the response is. I'd really love some reviews to let me know if I should continue.**

_**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Twilight, the amazing Stephenie Meyer owns all rights.**_

**That said please let me know what you thing!**

The next week passed in a blur, after the biggest obstacle, telling my parents was accomplished. They weren't thrilled with the news, but understood there wasn't another choice.

Jacob had the idea to invite my family over for dinner so that we could give them the news together. In total both my parents, my brother Stefan, my brother Liam, his girlfriend Maggie, and Rosalie joined us for dinner.

Rosalie had once again come through for me, when she agreed to come for mortal support. The whole day I spent worrying and having panic attacks, I knew it wouldn't be a big deal to my brothers, but I was afraid of how my mother would react. So much so that I nearly burned dinner during one of my mini panic attacks.

Liam showed some concerned and hoped that Jake and I could work things out. His mature take on the matter surprised me; I guess having a serious girlfriend had really changed my brother. He and Maggie have only been together for a few months, but they are already pretty much inseparable. As a matter of fact, I wouldn't be surprised if he got married before me. I'm really happy for both of them. Maggie is a great person and my brother has a kind heart, together they can have a wonderful life.

Stefan seemed shocked about the news but didn't provide any input on the situation. We have grown a bit apart over the last few years, for no particular reason. My guess is he's become too busy in his career to spend time worrying about other's problems. Stefan works as a lawyer for one of the top law firms in Los Angeles. I wasn't surprised about his choice in career either. I remember when we were kids he was always defending me from any bullies. He'd always make sure all the girls in my class knew he was my big brother, and that I wasn't to be messed with. It's really quite sad how much we've grown apart.

Of course my father was immediately concerned about how much it would cost to cancel the flowers, band, and catering. At least he was happy we hadn't paid the deposit for the location. Jacob and I assured him we would cover any cost the cancelations caused. He settled down after that, and allowed himself to be sympathetic.

To be honest I hadn't even planned on asking my parents for help paying for the wedding. Jacob and I had agreed to split the check, and my salary allowed me to cover my half without my parent's help.

My mother surprised me with her reaction. I thought she would break down and claim this to be the end of the word. I was also certain she would be worried about how this would affect the family's public appearance. Instead she apologized and offered to help with anything she could. She asked me a million questions to make sure I was okay with everything that was going on. She also agreed to accompany Rosalie and I on our trip to New York. She even went as far as putting Liam in charge of the PR for the new club, so that I could devote all my energy to the move.

By the end of dinner my whole family was on board with the change of plans. Liam was more than happy to take over for me. My father and mother believed I was doing the right thing by following Jacob to New York. Rosalie even managed to get all of our flights booked, for my appointment with the real estate agent in New York.

I also promised myself I would work harder to spend more time with my family. I really hated that Stefan and I were growing apart. Things would have to change before I lost him.

Jacob was also pleased about how things had gone over with my parents. He didn't want to go off to camp knowing my family was upset about the changes. There also wasn't any major backlash from the media, just a few rumors circulating the internet, which no one really paid attention to.

Jacob spent his last few days in meetings and hitting the gym to make sure he was physically prepared for training camp. I joined him on some of his workouts, simply to spend time with him before he went away. Seeing him workout made me realize how much he really loved his job. Of course I'm nowhere near physically capable of keeping up with him, but I get up early every morning and join him for a jog.

It is Monday morning and I'm up earlier than usual so that I can have a chance to cook Jacob breakfast before we set off for the airport. First I make the batter for his favorite kind of pancakes, banana chocolate chip, and when that's done I fry some eggs and bacon. I have to make double what I would usually make since Jacob's teammate Sam will be joining us for breakfast. Sam also spent his break in Los Angeles so I offered to drive them both to the airport.

Jacob immediately heads for the kitchen when he wakes, but I send him right back to get ready. After he is showered and has his things settled ready to go, I let him have a strip of bacon while we wait for Sam.

Luckily Sam shows up ten minutes before seven, which gives us a little bit over two hours before we have to be at the airport. Sam is one of coolest guys on the team; I had the pleasure of meeting him and his wife Emily at some games last season. He spent time here in Los Angeles with his family, Emily had joined him but she had had to fly back a few days early for work.

Jacob and Sam eat exactly like what they are, football players. They each eat half a dozen eggs, and several pounds of bacon. I stand memorized as I see them each pick up a stack of four pancakes. How so much food fits in a single person I'm unsure, but I guess it's good they'll be working it off later today.

We are out the door and on our way to the airport by eight-fifteen. Little is said on the way over. Both Jacob and I feel the tension of what this means. At least we'll get to see each other briefly Wednesday, which is the day my mom, Rose and, I will be meeting with the real estate agent.

It's hard saying goodbye to Jacob. He leaves me with a heavy feeling at the pit of my stomach. It's as if I know nothing will be the same after this. I don't know maybe it's a bad omen, but at the point we say our goodbyes, it's as if neither one of us is truly sad. Sure it is hard, but my guess is it's because we both feel the tension of not shading a tear.

It's true I'll get to see him Wednesday but it will only be for a couple of hours at best. I don't see us having another night together for a good month, and it's as if the idea of that doesn't affect us. So weird that I would feel like this now, I have never felt this tension and disconnection before.

After searching the internet for days I have narrow it down to five condos and houses that the agent has agreed to show us. Two of them being in the upper eastside, and the other three are located on the lower eastside.

My mother just about had a heart attack when I told her I was interested in owning a home in Brooklyn. According to her no daughter of Charlie and Renee Swan is to live in such a bad part of town. Truthfully I just don't want to be smacked in the middle of the city. I want to live a quiet and simple life, and I will go to great lengths to have that, even in New York.

The first place the agent takes us to is a two bedroom apartment on 78th Street. The home is decorated in a Parisian manner and is completed with a personal elevator. The space is big but cluttered with too many decorations. My mother loves it, and Rose likes certain aspects of the décor, I on the other hand find it to be too much. I find it to be overpriced for being just two bedrooms and two bathrooms. I feel the décor is too dark and in my opinion stuffy. I am looking for something simpler. This home is full of big paintings incased in intricate gold frames. It also has its fair share of statues and sculptures that don the living room. In all the apartment is not my style.

Next the agent takes us to a five floor townhouse with a roof-deck and an office, right in the heart of Tribeca. This place I like better. I love the brick lined walls, and the wood beam ceilings. But what I find to be the best part of the townhome is the roof garden and greenhouse. The roof is perfect for entertaining and the place is big enough to have family over. Being a huge film fan I like the history behind Tribeca, I can see myself attending the various film festivals, so that's a big plus.

Next we go to three different houses in Brooklyn. All three have the quality I seek most in this city, privacy. The first two are old homes, so the rooms are bigger than what you would normally expect in New York.

The first is a three bedroom home, which would be perfect to raise a family in. Being out of the city provides us with the luxury of having a back yard, something uncommon in this city. The home doesn't come furnished so it would give me a chance to start from scratch.

The second house is a four bedroom brownstone that has somewhat of a British charm to it. It comes partially furnished so it would still give me a chance to add my flair. The rooms are big and open and having an extra room would be helpful. This is the kind of place that I can really see myself spending the rest of my life in.

The final home is a Victorian style home with three bedrooms and four baths. The backyard is a bit smaller than the last two, but still big enough to maybe have a dog. The neighborhood is quiet and friendly. Our neighbor would be Mr. and Mrs. Greene who have been married and living in the same house for fifty years. The home needs some work, but I figure it would probably give me something to do while Jacob is away.

Of course my mother thinks I should pick the apartment on 78th street. She thought the other places were too plain, she also thought Jacob would appreciate that apartment more. She couldn't wait to tell my dad all about it.

Rosalie on the other hand showed preference for the townhouse in Tribeca. She agrees that the home has everything Jacob and I need. The place is big enough to entertain and the terrace garden and greenhouse are perfect. Yeah, the place is in the middle of the city but the neighborhood is quiet and the neighbors seem nice.

Although I lean towards Rosalie's choice, I still don't discount the houses we saw in Brooklyn. The houses are what I've always envisioned I would like to live in in a city like this. But I also have to take what Jacob wants into consideration.

Later that evening we agree to join Jacob at one of the hottest restaurant on the upper eastside, Butter. When we get to the restaurant they have a waiting line that takes up most of the block, but as always there is always an open door for the Swan family, especially with Jacob Black on my arm. We are escorted straight to a table when we arrive. As soon as we get to the table Jacob yells for the waiter, demanding a scotch on the rocks.

"Tough day?" I ask because I've never seen him be so rude to a person before.

He just brushes off the question and answers with a simple "nope, just thirsty." He just sits and fidgets in his seat, and when the waiter delivers his drink, he doesn't even bother to thank him.

"Well that was rude." My mom and Rose sit and act like they're not paying attention, but I could see Rose's reaction when he yells at the waiter.

"It's not rude. That's how you get these people's attention." Okay now he was being a jerk.

"Yeah well it wouldn't have killed you to say please and thank you."

"Why? It's their job, they're used to it." Okay he had surpassed the jerk stage, and was just being an asshole. I've never seen him act this way before. Is this how he always gets when he's in New York? Does he think that just because he's Jacob Black he can talk down to people?

I drop the subject and make a note to discuss it later, when we are alone. I really don't want to get into an argument in front of my mother, Rose, and what seems to be the entire city of Manhattan.

Luckily he settles down after we order our food, and another couple of drinks. However I can see that there is something going on with him, he usually doesn't drink this much.

As a matter of fact he has been acting weird ever since we met up after leaving the real estate agent's office. He didn't even bother to ask about the houses we had seen. But it wasn't just today. He's been acting like this for the last couple of days.

After speaking to him on the phone on Monday night, he promised he would call to check in on me Tuesday, but I never received the call. I ignored it, and figured he might have been exhausted after practice.

"So Jacob how are things going? How is training camp treating you?" My mother asks, as an attempt to break the ice I'm guessing.

"Yeah, it must be hard to go back after being on break for so long." Rosalie adds.

I tense up and pray to God he isn't rude. Rosalie is just coming to terms with our engagement, and the last thing I need is for him to act like an ass towards her.

"Thing are great, but I'm not going to lie the first day was tough." I finally allow myself to release the sigh that had been built up in my chest. "Yeah, coach went a little harder on us on Monday but Tuesday was better."

"It's a good thing you kept up with the work-outs while you were on break, otherwise you'd be out of shape". My mother adds with a light laugh trying to keep the mood light.

The conversation continues to flow lightly throughout dinner, but I can't shake the suspicion that something is off. Jacob behaves like a complete gentleman for the remainder of dinner.

As we make our way out we notice a small crowed has formed just outside the restaurant, no doubt all of them here for Jacob. He takes time and poses for all the cameras; he even pulls me to him and has me pose with him. He stops and signs some autographs for some fans, while we wait for the driver to pick us up.

So this is what it's going to be like from now on? The fans I don't mind, all they want is autographs and a quick photo, but the paparazzi on the other hand I can definitely do without. I hoped that by leaving LA I would also be leaving the unnecessary attention behind. Being the daughter of Charles and Renee Swan has always brought on a certain attention that I've never been completely comfortable with.

Being in the public eye can be such a fickle thing. People always wanting to know the details of your private life, not to mention all the so-called friends that turn on you because of the fame, or having a new rumor to deny each week, all those things can wear a person down. I have personally had enough, but know Jacob is new to the attention, plus James is always pushing him to be in the public eye.

After the restaurant we head to our hotel. We have to turn in early because our flights depart first thing in the morning. I don't even have anytime alone with Jacob since he is staying at a separate hotel with the team.

Jacob stops by in the morning before heading to practice. We have breakfast together in the hotel café, and discussed the places Rose, my mother, and I saw the day before. He shows interest in the property in Tribeca too and tells me to go ahead and put down an offer on it.

Finally after getting that out of the way, I work up to ask about his mood last night. "Are we going to talk about what happened last night?"

His face hardens and I realize he knew he was in the wrong "Look, you don't have to say it. I was acting like a pain in the ass. I know there is no excuse for the way I acted and I am sorry". In his eyes I can see that he is hiding something.

"You know you can talk to me, right? It's okay if you're stressed out, I understand, I just need you to talk to me". I sigh and reached across the table to place my hand on his.

I'm expecting him to open up, but instead he drops the conversation by saying "okay I'll try".

Rosalie and I talk and analyzed Jacob's reaction and determine that he probably is just stressed. Being a professional athlete can be unsettling at times. With the way players are traded, you never know where you'll end up next season.

Back in LA, and far away from all the chaos I leave Rosalie and my mother at LAX and take a cab to the only place that makes sense after the last couple of days.

The cab pulls up at Debbie's Dance Academy, Debbie isn't in but I have a spare key. Rose and I both studied here, that is until Rose begged her parents to let her quit. Dance is pretty much the only thing my parents let me continue studying when we lost everything.

I walk in, and everything is exactly where it has been for the last ten years. The studio is small with only one room covered in mirrors and ballet bars surrounding the length of the room. I unlock the stereo system and immediately go in search for warm up music. It doesn't take long for me to find a suitable cd. I pop in a Debussy collection and start off with Clair de Luna and began taking deep breaths and letting my muscles relax. I walk over to the bar placing my leg on it and begin to stretch.

Fifteen minutes later, after I'm all warmed up, I find myself dancing up and down the studio to Sia's Lullaby. The beautiful melody brings tears to my eyes. As the tears shed I can feel myself relax, and forget about the last couple of days. For the first time in days I feel optimistic about the future.

Let me know if I should continue. Do you like the way the story is going?


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